What I Think About At The Gym

1. I hate coming here.url

2. I want to swim, but I got sick the last two times I went in that pool. Those old people’s germs and diseases probably leap off them as they do those stupid waterobics.

3. Do they really need 36 giant TV screens in here? I don’t want to be forced to watch Faux News.

4. Personally, I think the villain monologues from Doctor Who on my playlist are pretty darn motivating.

5. That guy would be perfect casting for Sub-Mariner in movie, except for that hideous script tattoo across his chest.

6.  He could still pretty good casting in a Sub-Mariner porn movie.

7. Why do they mop the steps in the middle of the day? Can they really have gotten that dirty? Or is this some sort of Spartan/Tough Mudder element they’ve added to the daily workout?

8.Dude! Wipe up after yourself! Ugh. Not doing butterflys today.

9. “Dig through the ditches/And burn through the witches/I slam in the back of my/Dragula.”

10. My knee hurts.

11. How long do I have to cardio to have ice cream tonight? Let’s say 40 minutes.

12.  This is supposed to be low impact. Ow. OW.

13. My knee is never going to be right again.

14. Cookie dough or Cherry Garcia?

15. Class is out – they’re making them run around the indoor track. I couldn’t run if the Sub-Mariner guy was naked and holding stacks of money out for me.

16. “So light ’em up, up, up/Light ’em up, up, up/Light ’em up, up, up/I’m on fire”

17. Come on – I’m not even at 150 calories yet?

18. Whew. Ok. Onto that other thing that has no name. I dub thee, the Kind-of-ski-like-motionator.

19. Growing a beard itches. Not sure this is going to work.

20. Maybe dulce de leche. Or fudge brownie. Mmmmm.*

21. I have to remember to DVR Sons of Anarchy when I get home.

22.”Go-go Power Rangers! Go-go Power Rangers! You Mighty Morphin Power Rangers!” I don’t remember putting that on this playlist. Oh, well. “Go-go Power Rangers!”

23. Am I lip-syncing, or am I saying this out loud?

24.I should go to the doctor.  This is not just pain, this is I-played-rugby-for-two-years-and-fucked-up-my-knee pain.

25. What was I going to DVR? I just saw a commercial for it? Dammit!

26. OMG, it’s over. Until tomorrow.

* We went with fudge brownie.

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